Trying to kill myself

There’s a saying that goes, “If it doesn’t kill you, it’ll make you stronger.” It’s true.

But what does it mean? It’s not talking about easy stuff. It’s talking about stuff that comes within a nanospace of killing you.

Unless you’re diabetic or something, eating marshmallows won’t kill you. Does that mean eating marshmallows will make you stronger?

Nah, that’s not what it means. It’s talking about doing hard things.

  • Like working 100 hours per week.
  • Like giving away 10,000 dollars when you only make 20,000 per year.
  • Like respecting your friend who cheated on his wife.
  • Like spending time with your kids when you could be working 100 per week or surfing in Australia.
  • Like learning to like carrot juice, ditching textbooks, or trying to graduate in three years total.

The opportunities, big or small, are everywhere. Notice also, though, I didn’t list anything that happens accidentally.

Often the “If it doesn’t kill you, it’ll make you stronger” phrase is applied to situations that don’t occur on purpose. Like getting fired from a job, getting dumped by a girlfriend, or losing a close relative to cancer.

Forget this accidental (victim) stuff. I don’t want to almost die accidentally. I want to grow stronger on purpose.

So I challenge myself. I push myself. And I surround myself with friends who challenge and push me. I do hard things on purpose to grow.

I try to kill myself with life.